Aapla lagna… hot kuthe aahe, Khadoos?

Apurva shifted closer to him, keeping aside her cup. “Why? Because she has made you believe so? Didn’t you say you don’t care what she says?”   

“You should listen to your father, Apurva. I am not worth your blind trust.”

She dropped her face in her palms when her frustration crossed the threshold. “Do you know what hurts me the most, Khadoos? It is the fact that you chose her over me. Tula mahiti aahe, Suva-Aai ne mala ekda saangitla hota… sansaar he double-seat cha vaahan asta. Tya-var tisra maanus basla ki accident inevitable asto but guess what… we can still avoid our accident pan tu tila aaplya scooter varun khaali utaravayla tayarach nahi aahe.”

“Accident already zala aahe, Apurva. Aata ti basu de ki utaru de, badalnaar… kahich nahiye.”

She couldn’t believe that he was the same man who had promised to stick to her through thick and thin. “It upsets me even more to hear that our relationship is not worth fighting for in your eyes. So, what do you really want me to do? Back off, hmm? Is that what you really want me to do, Khadoos?”

Her words felt like shards of glass to him, each one piercing his resolve. Overhearing a part of the conversation she was having with her father had only served to deepen his anguish. “Yes, that is what I would like you to do. Can you do that?”

You don’t know what a pathetic liar you are, Khadoos. Staring at his trembling hand, she could only take a deep breath and convince herself to drop the topic, knowing that he would have told her everything on his own if he could. 

If he had made up his mind for something as drastic as it, then trying to make him do otherwise was pointless, she knew. Moreover, she still had other ways of finding things out. 

“Why don’t we sit inside?” she asked while standing up with her unfinished cups of tea. It seemed like tea wasn’t in her fate that day. Not like she earnestly wanted it anyway. She had brought a cup for herself because getting only for him would have looked odd. 

“Tu ja. Mi ithech thik aahe.” He refused in a monotonous voice. 

“I’ll have to ask Suva-Aai…” she said, pushing her hands into her pockets. 

He shot her a questioning look. 

“I’ll have to ask Suva-Aai what she ate during her pregnancy for you to be this stubborn so that I can avoid all of that!”

His eyebrow that had lifted stayed in its place when her answer only increased his confusion. What was she even saying?

Stepping closer, she bent to his height. “Having a stubborn husband would be enough. I’ll go mad if my kids turn out to be as stubborn as their father so I’ll have to strictly avoid what Suva-Aai had when you were in her stomach. Get it?” 

His heart sank as her words echoed in his ears like a curse – a painful reminder of the life they could’ve had if only things were different. Drowning in a sea of hopelessness, he knew there was no way out of the situation than suffocating himself to his end. “You’re making me uncomfortable, Apurva,” he said, upon feeling her unwavering gaze on him.  

“Why don’t you just come inside with me then? I’ll stop making you uncomfortable once we get inside, hmm?”

The fact that his statement could not even make her flinch let aside back off was bothersome for him. She was making clear with every gesture of hers that she wasn’t going to make things easy for him. He hadn’t expected otherwise anyway.

 “You promise to keep your mouth shut?” he asked, wanting to make sure that he wouldn’t be pestered more. 

 “Yeah, unlike you, I am quite trustworthy.” Came her reply. 

After putting her phone on silent mode, her gaze went back to his face on her shoulder. She had stayed true to her promise of keeping quiet once they settled on the bench in front of Dada-Kaka’s room. Her mind was too busy coming up with every possible scenario regarding Shashank’s situation to notice when he dozed off until his head fell to her shoulder. 

How long have you been losing sleep over this, Khadoos? Carefully taking off his spectacles, she kept them aside. How long has it been for you to have slept well, Khadoos? Why couldn’t you tell me? Why wouldn’t you tell me? 

She sat still for the next several minutes, letting him catch up on rest while she used the time to try and recall every single thing she had known that she could possibly use to get him out of Netra’s trap.

Her eyes were glued to the screen of her phone when she was interrupted by a message notification. 

Sorry, Apurva. We think it’s gone. The only way you can find the truth now is by making Shashank confess. Keep me updated. – Ishika

Her eyes shut in regret, her hand pressing over her face. Learning what she was counting on was gone made her feel utterly miserable, almost making her want to accept her defeat. 

The feeling was rather temporary though. Her gaze went to Shashank who was still asleep.  Once she reminded herself of what would happen if she quit the fight midway, she knew she had no time to sulk. 

He stirred from his slumber. After blinking away the remnants of sleep, the warmth of her shoulder beneath her cheek made him pull away as quickly as he could. It took him a moment to register that he had fallen asleep on her. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to. Why didn’t you wake me up? How long has it been?” He shot a series of questions, rubbing his eyes. 

“Not more than ten minutes…”

He tilted his hand to take a look at his wristwatch to verify her claim. 4.30 a.m. “Lagna-nantar hi tuzi hi khota bolaychi savay ashich raahnar aahe?” He clutched the arm of the bench upon realizing what he had blurted out. He was struggling to come up with how to take it back when she slapped him with a reality check.

“Aapla lagna… hot kuthe aahe, Khadoos?” She gave him a small smile before she stood up to stretch her sore shoulder. “Sod te. Come with me.”

“I don’t want to,” he said, rising to his feet. Slightly pushing the door open, he looked inside. Dada-Kaka and Mai were still asleep. He closed the door back. “I thought you agreed to leave me alone.”

“Appu!” 

They looked aside, hearing the familiar voice and found Amey and Manasi standing there. The duo walked up to Apurva and Shashank. “Tu ja. Aamhi aahot ithe,” Manasi said, keeping her hand on Apurva’s shoulder. 

Apurva nodded, looking at Shashank. “Chal.”

“Kuthe chal? Mala watata mi tula aadhich saangitla-” 

“Shashank,” Amey cut him off, giving him a long stare, “tula bahutek mahiti nahi aahe pan Appu ni tuzyasathi khup kahi kela aahe so please… tichyashi vyavasthit bol.” 

Amey’s warning was rather subtle but it caught Shashank off-guard. What did he mean by that? Shashank’s gaze stayed on Amey, trying and failing to decipher his words for several moments before he looked at Apurva who had held Amey’s wrist right after he spoke – a silent indication to keep quiet. 

What was she hiding? Shashank continued to ponder. “Mhanje?” he finally asked when he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. He saw Apurva and Amey exchanging glances which left him even more perplexed. He could clearly see that Apurva didn’t want Amey to say what he had said. 

Apurva let go of Amey’s hand and stepped closer to Shashank. “Khadoos, aaj pasun tuza aani maaza kahi ek sambandha nasnaar aahe. Tu Netra Tai shi lagna karnaar aahes. Tya-nantar aapan kadhi bhetana tar dur… kadachit kadhi bolu suddha shaknaar nahi. Out of respect for whatever – real or fake – that we shared in the past six- three months, will it be too much for me to ask you to come with me for one last time?”

Unshed tears pricked at the corners of Shashank’s eyes upon hearing her defeated voice. Where had he brought her? The one he always wanted to see winning anywhere and everywhere had lost.

He had made her lose.  

“Will it be?” she asked again, staring into his eyes.

His longing to let his pain flow freely from his eyes grew intense but he could only force his gaze to the floor and walk ahead, afraid that he might get caught. 

“Exactly a week ago, you were here when you sent me this.” She turned her phone’s screen toward him, showing him their chat.

Lonely hand. His gaze stayed on the picture he himself had clicked. He couldn’t stem the memories flooding his mind. It was an unforgettable night indeed. How could he not remember the time when he had walked on the path of self-destruction?

Despite his desperate attempts to avoid it, the conversation seemed inevitable – the conversation that demanded every mask of deception to fall off. 

“Khadoos, mala traas hotoy!” 

“Bas kar n mag?” His reply was curt and immediate. Taking the phone from her hand, he turned off the screen before he kept it between them on the bench. “Bas… kar n mag!” 

“Exactly, Khadoos,” she said, grabbing the phone back and scrolling through the never-ending list of messages they had exchanged for the past three months in front of him, “BAS KAR NA? Did you seriously expect me to give in to this utterly ridiculous plan of yours? Did you really expect me to buy any of it? Did you really…. Khadoos? Did you really expect me to believe that you don’t… love me?”

Despite her furiously loud tone, all that she was met with was sickening silence from his end. 

The chatter of the birds that had emerged from their slumber filled the air as if contributing to the heavy conversation happening. Neither Apurva nor Shashank could tell whose side those birds were on – if they were on hers, urging him to give in, or if they were on his, urging her to give up. 

“Khadoos…” 

Sensing her shifting aside a little after whispering his name, he looked at her. Seeing her creating distance between them, he wondered what she was up to. 

“Let’s take a break. Let’s forget who we are. Take me as a stranger. Everything that you’ve been hiding,” she paused, placing her palm on his chest, “here… let it out.”

Do leave your comments after reading. <3