Silent Whispers By Ashwini

Written By – Ashwini 

“Taap alay na.. tari kiti boltoys re! Gapp! Ekdum gapp! ” She silenced him putting her index finger on his lips. He looked at her speechless.  Her eyes were red  from the constant crying. Her tears always melted him. He fought back his desire to wipe the semi dried tears on her cheeks.

“Kiti maaj karte hi! Hichach saglyanni satat aikaycha.. nahi ka! Ki mag madam khush!” He thought, furrowing his eyebrows as she fussed over him to drink the ‘Kaadha’ she made.

“Kay Khadoos? Zhala manatlya manat mala badbadun zhala..?” Apu said as she held the mug to his mouth.

He looked at her surprised. “She sure knows some ‘Chetuk’, this Shishta!” He thought.

“Arey kay, pitoys na? Don’t worry, Mai chyach recipe pramane kelay!”

 “Tu jaates ka ithun Apurva? Mi ghein nantar.” He said, his voice feeble from the high fever.

 “Nantar bintar chalnaar nahi”, she said, her voice stern yet cracking. She made him prop  up from the bed adjusting  the pillows behind him.

With no strength  left in him, he resented to her command. As he took the first sip, he was surprised  that the Kaadha indeed tasted like the one Mai always made.

 “Zhalay ata Kadha piun, tu jaa ata! Mala zhopu de shantpane!! Tula kahi ek garaj nahiye majhi kalagi karnyachi.” He lashed out holding his head that hurt from the fever and also the incidences that happened  in office.

 She ignored his statement and asked softly, “Doka dukhtay ka? Thamb apan balm lavuya.. tula bara vatel, Arey! Ha light pan dolyavar yetoy tujhya.. thamb dim karte!” She got up to get the balm and also dimmed the lights.

 “Tujha kay challay, ka traas detiyes? Sangitlana mala ektyala rahu de. I can manage, Ani nahi jamla tar aai la bolven mi. Pan tu jaa na baai!”  He tried to get up from the bed in order to change, but stumbled as he had no strength left with that kind of temperature. He was weak and had chills.

“Kaay aahe na, ratriche 11 vaajlet ani mi Mai and Suva aai la promise kelay ki mi tujhi kalagi ghein.. ata itkya ushira tyanna  disturb karnaar aahes ka? ” She asked as she supported him protecting him from the fall.

 “Thank you!” He said instinctively and shrugged  her hand off his arm.

 “Angaat takad nahiye tujhya, aaik majha, Khadoos.Tu bed  varun uthaycha prayatna karu nakos.”

“Ugich majhi khoop kalagi aahe asa aav aanu nakos!  Itkich kalagi asti tar divorce divorce kela nastas sarkha sarkha. Ho kelya mi sahya tujhyashi na bolta. Pan chuk majhi ektyachi aslyasarkha sagle malach aaropi tharav.. tharavtayat!” He coughed as his voice increased in decibels.

 Apurva instantly rose to her feet, rubbing his back. She was shocked at how hot his back felt.  He brushed her hand off roughly. His expressions wary.

She was hurt yet again by his harsh words and even harsher reactions. She fought back her tears  that threatened to spill out any moment. She had never seen Khadoos like this. He looked  pale, and his eyes defeated.

 As his bout of cough subsided, and he calmed down a bit. Apurva slowly said, “Khadoos, aplyala taap check karayala havay. Tujha anga taaplay.”

 He tried to retaliate, but had no strength left. She made him lie down and checked his temperature which was a scary 103°. She was terrified. She immediately  called her father who suggested her to give him an anti-pyretic(fever medicine) and keep cold water strips on his forehead  to reduce the temperature  instantly. Luckily, he had eaten  the ‘maubhaat’ Mai had got for him, therefore  he could be given medicine right away.

 Apurva gave him the tablet with some warm water. She did not have to persuade him at all. He was so exhausted that fell in a fitful sleep. He was intermittently whining due to the body ache.

 Apurva ran to the kitchen to get ice cold water and grabbed some kerchiefs from the cupboard. She was back at his side instantly and  kept the cold strip on his forehead. He whined as his body acknowledged  the cold, but she was there holding his hand tightly, reassuring him. Tears kept streaming down her eyes, as she changed the cold strips that got warm instantly  after being kept on her forehead. 

“Khadoos la lavkar bara vatude Deva! Please!” she prayed silently. She was utterly surprised as she caught herself praying. Although, she was always a believer, she had to remember when she has prayed to God so earnestly.

 After about an hour, his fever began declining and she saw Khadoos at ease.  She checked the temperature again and it had fallen down to 100.5°F. She heaved a sigh of relief. Her hand kept holding his tightly all this while. She was about to get up from his side to get a towel, when she heard him murmur in sleep. He had tightened his grip over her hand. “Mala sodun kuthehi jau nakos Apu! Nahi Na Jaanar, kadhich?”

“Tula sodun kuthe jaanar mi Khadoos? Mi ithech aahe.. Kayam Tujhya Sobat.” She reassured, tears streaming down her cheeks.

 She realised, the mere thought of separation, had affected his health. She could not fathom what he would go through  if she  really left. He kept chanting her name as the medications took over. She gently held his face in her palms and  kissed his forehead. “Mi ithech aahe, haan Khadoos!” Ithech Aahe  mi. Thandi vaajtey tula.. jacket aanu? He could manage just a nod.

 She opened the closet to look for the jacket that was put away in the topmost shelf. She stood on a stool to get it.. As she picked the jacket, she noticed a beautifully carved wooden box underneath it. It had a vintage feel. She got it down along with the jacket, curious  to know what it held.

 She helped him wear the jacket  and zipped it up. She also  put on the hood to protect his ears  form the cold. He looked cute and childlike  in the jacket. She refrained herself from pulling his cheeks.Tucking in the blanket again l, she checked again if he was comfortable. Pulling in the chair, she sat next  to his bed side, slowly opening the box.

 She was pleasantly surprised at the contents it held. The inside  of the box, had a paper pasted on it. Her name was written in a beautiful  calligraphic  handwriting. The box had several small cloth pouches. With trembling hands she picked one and opened it. She saw a single earring in it with a small note. She remembered wearing this very earring for Sumi’s wedding function. She recollected, that she had lost one of the pair and had thought it must have fallen somewhere. She opened the note and it read:

 Aaplya bhetichi hi khun, majhyach payala lagavi? 

Kaa kunas thaauk, pan vatatey hi kayam japavi.

Apurva’s lips curved into a big smile  and eyes glistened looking at this beautiful memory. She glanced at Khadoos still  wincing in sleep due to body ache. She squeezed his arm to let him know that she is there.

She picked a pouch that looked stuffed. It had a small burnt piece of her dupatta.  She opened it, nostalgia engulfing her. She reminisced that day vividly. Her 1st Diwali with the Kanitkar’s! She remembered how she fell right into his arms outside  the temple. Though  he did not  like her, he could not help complimenting her for her traditional look. They were blessed by the priest who called them an ideal couple. She remembered  their scandalized glances. Back at home she remembered  how Shashank showed presence  of mind and saved her from fire. She recalled how concerned  he looked. Her cheeks turned pink as she remembered  his warm gaze when he saw her in a saree. She remembered  how Kanitkar’s instantly had embraced her for the way she was. She remembered  how happy she felt as she enjoyed with them that day. The day she 1st experienced Family!! 

There was a note that fell which read:

 Tula vachavtana ha dupatta matra jalala,

Aaj tula saadit pahun, ek kshan ka hoi na, haa jeev nakkich bhulala!

This side of Khadus was totally new to her.  She never  imagined how deeply he thought of her and  treasured the little things. She glanced at him with moistened eyes. How sensitive and lovable was he!

 Apurva picked the next pouch. The mild  fragrance reached her senses before she opened it. She delicately  removed the dried yellow rose along with a little note. She was surprised  that Khadoos was so thoughtful to have kept the memory of the day they signed the contract so carefully. She felt warm that he respected her 1st ever gift to him. She opened the note and read it smiling ear to ear. It read:

Contract was signed, sealing our fate,

Exchanging our gifts, did we just  have a mini date?

Just then she heard him call out for water. Instantly  she was by his side. She made him prop up and sit as he had water. The fever had made him so weak that he could hardly sit up. She  helped him lie down

again holding his hand. He kept  clasping her hand for a few long seconds his eyes on her, but then averted them and tried to push her hands away. She let out a tear, knowing that he was truly hurt. She sat there stroking his hair.Within seconds, sleep engulfed him.

She opened the box again. Opening another pouch, she found a chocolate wrapper which  she instantly remembered  was from the day he had come home to visit her when she was down with fever. Though he tried  to sound that he was there for formality, his gestures spoke a different language. The language of care, concern, love, worry and belonging. She reminisced how  elated she had been to see him around. He had got her, her favorite  chocolates and she recalled his lopsided million dollar smile as she ate it. She searched for the note along with it. It read:

 Tu aajari aslyacha ek phone kay ala,

Tula pahanyasathi ka jeev kasavis zhala,

Chocolates gheun tujhyasathi, ha Khadus nighala,

Asakasa mala tujha chhand lagla?

 She smiled through her tears recollecting that day. She realised that, though her Khadoos, could not express well. His action were just full of love.

 The box was full of memories of all the time they had spent together. All the memories they made in the past year before and after their marriage. She was surprised at the smallest of things that he had treasured. A small packet of ‘Akshata'(colorful rice grains) from their wedding ceremony, a few dried mogra flowers from their first night. He had the mantra he was tricked to say at the Chandradarshan Vidhi. A few candid photographs of her that he clicked during Babi atya’s  wedding. A broken bangle piece when they had participated in the best couple competition. A few coffee beans from the coffee shop they had been during their  dating phase. And finally, the cotton ball from their recent pillow fight. Apurva was choked. She was overwhelmed at the love he had for her. She regretted every moment she doubted his love for her. She hated herself at all the moments  she doubted him with Netra tai. She regretted not seeing his efforts for her. He was a changed man.  She carefully kept away the box along with its contents.

That night she realised.. she was the only one for him..  always, forever..! And that no one could love her, comfort her, care for her the way he did. His actions spoke volumes, his gestures  oozed love. She knew  he wasn’t perfect. She knew he was short tempered.. but what  had not imagined was that he was devoted to her. Completely  and totally  devoted!

He looked so peaceful when he slept. She placed her palm on his forehead. There was no fever. She quietly jumped into the duvet next to him. His arm was already outstretched. As she placed her head on it, it curled around her as if instinctively. She watched him smile in his sleep. She placed a light peck on his cheek and promised in his ear ” Kiti hi bhandlo, kiti hi vaad zhale, kiti tu mala kahi hi bolalas tari, ata mi tula sodun kuthech jaanar nahiye, Khadoos! Karan mala mahitiye.. hya Shishta, uddhat and swatahachach mhanana khara karnarya, thodyashya stupid, Apurva Vartak Kanitkar sathi; ha Chashmish, hushaar, premal , chidka, introvert  and Khadoos Dr.Shashank Kanitkarach perfect aahe!!. She  smiled and hugged him tight.. sleeping peacefully on his chest. “We will be Together, forever Khadoos!” she whispered.