Thipkyanchi Rangoli – Episode 253 – Episode Review

No, I ain’t giving you a second chance,
Yes, I ain’t sparing you another glance.
Did you give me a chance to explain myself in Avantika Tai’s matter?
Did you wait before making me feel like an absolute stranger?
I still like you, Khadoos, but I can’t come back,
Because I don’t have it in me to take your another attack!
– IAdoreYouCreates

M Y   T A K E  

H O N E S T Y

I seek your forgiveness,
Confessing that without you, I feel homeless

“He bagh, Apurva… tuzyashi lagna kelyacha mala pashchatap kadhich nahi zala. Haan mi tula je kahi bollo te… far chikicha hota. Te ragachya bharat mi bollo. Tyabaddal mala… maaf kar. I am really sorry. Sagla visar aani… aaplya ghari chal!”

Aaplya! Did you notice that he said aaplya. Not tuzya. Not mazya. 

Aaplya! 

And that’s how Mr. Kanitkar makes you pause and want to just let go of the mess that he has created.

And that’s what I call a genuine apology and an earnest attempt to seek forgiveness. 

Raw, honest and unfiltered.

 My review for the earlier episode is still *work in progress* so you’ll know when it’s done that I was extremely disappointed in Shashank. I did not feel that he was regretting things enough. Sure, the realization of having gone wrong was there but the guilt wasn’t as strong as I had expected it to be. 

But in this one… I did see that and I appreciate that. 

“He bagh, Apurva… tuzyashi lagna kelyacha mala pashchatap kadhich nahi zala.”

I am sorry for having made you feel that I regret you and our marriage though. While I am not sure if this apology is enough, I do want you to know that I may have not liked a lot of things that you did and do but I don’t think there has ever been a moment when I felt that I should have married someone else instead. 

Ever since it was decided that it was going to be you and I and even before that for that matter – the thought of ‘someone else’ has never popped up in my head. It wasn’t even a deliberate effort. I just… couldn’t hold anyone but you in my heart. 

It has always been you. All along.

Even when we fought.
Even when we messed up.
Even when we… lost. 

It has always been you. All along, Apurva. All along. 

I admit that I am not always right. I admit that you are not always wrong. I admit that I still don’t understand you as well as I used to think I do. 

I admit it all, Apurva and all that I can say to you at the moment is – sorry. I want you to come back to our home, our room and our… relationship. You’ve no idea how my every night has been ever since you left. My heart has been so constantly insecure, falling in the loop of what ifs. 

What if I have pushed you too far this time?
What if you never turn your feet in my direction again?
What if… you never allow me to be your teddy again?
What if… Khadoos and Shishta’s tale never starts again?

What if… Shishta never allows Khadoos to be hers and herself to be his again?

“Haan mi tula je kahi bollo te… far chikicha hota. Te ragachya bharat mi bollo.”

I don’t know when my temperament got so bad that it began not to let me keep calm in moments of conflict. Spending my mornings and nights without you made me realize that I have been unfair to you a lot of times, Apurva and I still cannot understand why. 

Maybe it’s because of the image that I had made of you in my mind during our initial encounters. My heart kept modifying it as we fell into the situation that made me see you in a different light but before my new image of you could get permanent… you would hide something from me and that image would get blurred. Again and again!

Not that I am justifying myself… I am just keeping my side of the story that you probably wouldn’t even want to consider at the moment and rightfully so. Rightfully so. 

All that I am asking for is… a second chance. 

For us. 

“Tyabaddal mala… maaf kar. I am really sorry. Sagla visar aani… aaplya ghari chal!”

Our room misses your fragrance just the way I miss listening to your heartbeats when you used to be sound asleep in my arms,
Ever since you have abandoned me, withdrawing your presence from my life, I am daily losing myself in these frightening storms.
Please forgive me for scarring your heart,
Please give me a chance to be your very own elixir, Sweetheart. 

A N X I E T Y

“Te mala nahi jamnar, Khadoos. Kharach sangte mi…. tu je bollayas na… tya saglya goshtinsathi mi tula maaf nahi karu shakat!”

“”Ek sandhi nahi denar mala?”

“Nahi… Khadoos, mi jevha jevha ghari yete na tevha tevha mala tech aathavata sagla je tu bollayas! Kasa yeu mi ghari?”

What are you thinking, Khadoos, hmm? What are you thinking? You think what you said to me is so easy to forget? Why should I forget it in the first place? What reason do I even have to leave it all behind and come back with you to the home that you regret making me a part of?

 I agree I did hide things from you. I agree I did break your promise but did I lie? I don’t think I did, Khadoos. I did tell you that there is something that I am keeping away from you because I knew you wouldn’t let me do it had I told you about it and I could not afford not to do it. 

I could not afford not to bring Dada-Kaka and Avantika Tai in front of each other.
I could not afford not to make them meet… Khadoos.
I could not afford…. Not to fight for my family’s happiness. 

I could not. 

Do I believe that you did not have the right to be upset at the broken promise? No, I don’t.
But do I believe that it gave you the right to insult our relationship and marriage? No, I don’t. 

I know, you still consider me as the stupid girl who understands nothing but you know what, Khadoos? I do understand a lot of things. On the contrary, I feel it’s you who fails to see things unless verbalized. 

Because had that not been the case, you would have known that for once… I could stand you insulting me but not our marriage. You still have no clue how precious our marriage has become to me, no?  

Our marriage has brought to me everything that I have longed for all my life. 

A huge family that loves me like I am their Moulyawan Moti! Now don’t ask how I know that difficult Marathi world. Dada-Kaka had once called me that and it sounded so sweet that I stored it in my memory. 

My Kukki Gang who supports me no matter what. Who understands me no matter what. Who defends and protects me no matter what. 

And… you. The husband I didn’t even know I desired. 

But oh…. How foolish was I to think that our marriage was as beautiful for you as it was for me!

Thanks to you that now I know that our marriage is not beautiful but a mistake for you.  

The mistake that you regret.
The wife that you regret. 

And that’s precisely why… I am never coming back to you, Khadoos. I am never coming back to you. 

Best moment in the episode

“Mi kay karto na…. Aata udyapasun tu sodun kaslach vichar karnar nahi. Chalel?”

Worst moment in the episode

“Maskari kartoy!”

The Stinging Accusation

“Aapla relation pan na he asach aahe, Khadoos. Mi kahitari efforts ghete. Kahitari achieve karte aani tu yeun te sagla todun taktos! Aapla nata suddha tuzyach mule tutla aahe, Khadoos. Arey tuzya changlya vagnyachi ek aathvan hoti mazyakade… hi trophy…  ti hi todun taklis tu?”

  The Surprising Confession

“Aaplya aajchya sundar divsachi hi khaas aathvan akhand aahe. Pan tu te na baghtach nighun gelis. Aapla nata hi he ya trophy sarkha akhand rahil na?” 

The Sadistic Pleasure  

“Geli…”

I couldn’t not laugh when Dr. Anjali Vartak chuckled at Dr. Kaushik upon watching Apurva leave the conversation, visibly not up for revisiting the counselor. 

The Lost Treasure 

“Appu ka nahi aali tuzyasobat?” 

And the saga named Kanitkars’ Longing For Their Treasure continues…

Favorite Moment From the Episode!

“Kay zala? Dole band ka kelet?”

“Nahi.. kahi nahi!”

Feel free to share your feedback in the comment section. That just works as something that makes me want to write more, better and faster. Much love.